After the Fat Lady Sings
How to Come Home from Travel Without Needing Therapy (or a Hazmat Suit)
Returning home from travel always messes with your head. One minute you’re sipping wine in Tuscany, the next you’re wrestling with the washing machine that smells like something died in it. Coming home can feel like a blessing or a full-blown crash landing — but don’t fret, there’s plenty you can do to ease back into daily life without sacrificing your travel glow or your sanity.
True Confession: I’m a Hot Mess Traveler
Let’s get this out of the way: I’m not the best traveler. I struggle with bus schedules, jet lag that could knock out a herd of elephants, and I can get lost in airports I’ve already been to twice. I still don’t use SIM cards and fumble my way through foreign countries with nothing but Wi-Fi, Google offline maps, an extra dose of common sense, and a power bank that’s seen better days.
Yet, here I am, writing and hopefully inspiring you to travel. When I return home from a trip, I’m basically a train wreck in yoga pants. But over the years, I’ve learned a few secrets to making the return home smoother than the Eurostar from London to Paris.
Clean It Up
Regardless of how many hours (or days) it’s required to get home, take a shower or bath. Wash off the “Lord knows what” layer of mystery microbes clinging to your skin. You’ll feel human again — or at least human-adjacent.
Unpack (Yes, Really)
I know, obvious. But hear me out. Unpacking right away helps you see what needs washing (spoiler: everything), including those “favorite jeans” now decorated with a red wine abstract pattern. Unpacking as soon as possible can help you psychologically ground yourself in your regular routine. And for heaven's sake, don´t ever, ever put your post-travel filthy luggage on your bed to unpack.
Decontaminate the Evidence
Before you shove your luggage into a closet, clean and sanitize it. Thoroughly. Inside and out. That bag has rolled over train platforms, taxi trunks, and who-knows-what in that questionable Airbnb. Clean your packing cubes, toiletry bag, shoes, and shoe bags. Call me OCD, but this is important. Cleaning and sanitizing wipes work great along with a simple vinegar/water solution.
Research says the bottom of your suitcase and its wheels contain 58 times more bacteria than a public toilet seat — including E. coli, staph, and black mold. So yeah, wipe (and sanitize) that baby down.
Pro Tip: If you’re too fried to clean right away, leave your luggage on the patio, in the garage, or seal it in a trash bag. I once found an uninvited Greek (or was it Croatian) insect stowing away in my backpack. Glad I unpacked before it could set up a household.
Give Your Body a Hug
Drink: Rehydrate like your life depends on it — because it kind of does. Airplanes are basically giant dehydrators with wings. Drink some real electrolytes (potassium, magnesium, sodium, etc.), not that blue “sports drink” sugar soup.
Protect Your Immune System: Returning home can be a shock to the system. I ramp up on zinc, vitamin C, vitamin D, and my personal witch’s brew of immunity potions. Do what works for you, preferably without summoning the spirits.
Jet Lag: It’s real. This morning (October 15) was the first time since returning from my last trip (August 26) that I woke up before 7 a.m. The neighbors could hear me shouting, “Hallelujah!” Melatonin messes with my mind and heart rate, so I rely on patience, time, and the move your booty below. Find what works for your jetlag and stick to it.
Eat: Before I leave for a trip, I stash a few healthy freezer meals for my return — because cooking with half a brain cell is never wise. A travel buddy I know places her grocery delivery order for the next morning after arrival. Never the same day, as we all know what can happen with travel delays.
Move Your Booty
Every time I come home from a trip, my body feels like it’s been in a bumper car derby. Muscles ache, joints protest, my neck hates me. Even though I’m that restless passenger in 32D — stretching, doing lunges and wall pushups in the galley — I still return home feeling like an accordion. In late October, I have an eight-hour bus trip to my next pet sit in a tiny northern Portugal village (yippy), and the aches and stiffness will remind me that I´m not 23 years old anymore.
So stretch. Walk. Take a hot bath. Do five minutes of yoga. Repeat. Move something other than your eyes scrolling through Instagram. Your body will thank you, and your brain might start functioning again.
Home Sweet Chaos
Here’s where pre-travel prep pays off. A few days before leaving, do yourself a favor:
Change your sheets. You want to come home and sleep well.
Clean the floors and bathrooms.
Take out the trash. (Because no one likes coming home to Eau de Rotten Milk. Yes, I know this from experience.)
Empty the washing machine and dishwasher.
Upon returning, collect your mail (if you still get any), glance at it, then ignore it for a few days. The IRS can wait.
When the Blues Come Callin’
Ah, the post-travel funk. That hollow feeling when the adventure fades and routine slaps you across the face. You´ve gone from exploring new foods and locations and experiencing everything through the eyes of childlike wonder to cleaning the litter box, picking up the kids from soccer, and preparing for your annual employee review. Here’s how to process the post-travel funk without buying a one-way ticket to Portugal (tempting, though):
Integrate your travel mindset: Take a different route to work, explore your own neighborhood, and try that vegan café you always pass.
Be present: When we travel, we notice everything. Keep that curiosity alive at home.
Breathe: Don’t rush back into work and chaos. Let yourself land mentally, emotionally, and physically, especially if your latest trip was NOT all sunshine and postcards. Sh*t happens.
Plan your next trip: Even a weekend getaway or day trip keeps your soul humming. Having something to look forward to is the antidote to “real life.”
Pro Tip: Sort through your photos. Delete the duds, like the accidental close-up of your thumb. Or worse, that not-so-accidental cleavage shot of your server. Create a digital folder for memories you actually want to remember.
Let It Go
So what if it takes you four days to unpack or clean your luggage? Don’t pressure yourself to “snap back” instantly. Travel changes you, it’s supposed to. With a little grace (and maybe a power nap), you’ll find your post-travel rhythm again.
Until then, sip a glass of therapy (we call it Sangria in Portugal), stare at your suitcase, and dream about where it’ll take you next. That’s not avoidance. That’s strategy.